How To Break Out Of Your Zone And Conquer Shyness

Many of us consider ourselves shy. Shyness is a learned behavior and with some work you can learn the behaviors that will help you conquer your shyness and be able to fully participate in all situations.

Behind the feelings of shyness usually lie feelings of fear and inadequacy. You have been telling yourself that your opinion is not important enough to be heard or you fear what others will think of your ideas. Shyness most often occurs in unfamiliar situations or around those we don't know.

To help yourself overcome shyness you will need to break out of your comfort zone. To start with, check your body language. You may be actually putting people off through your unknown signals. Try to make sure your face is not pouting or angry. Smile at people. Be aware of your posture and your gestures. Maintain eye contact with others instead of looking away.

Try starting up conversations instead of waiting for others to start. Prepare for short conversations with others by rehearsing dialogue in your head. It's always a good idea to open with a compliment, as long as it is genuine. Or think about newsworthy items, weather related topics and other general subjects. Learn to be a risk taker by being the first one to start a conversation.

Put your listening skills to work. Most shy people have become very good listeners. Turn your great listening abilities into conversations. Key in on several things the other person said and focus on questions about those things. This is a very successful tactic in talking with others. They see that you have picked up on their interests and are happy to continue talking about them.

Ask open-ended questions. This is important in keeping conversations going. Instead of asking yes or no questions make sure that you ask questions that require the other person to answer in complete sentences. This opens up dialogue and gives room to ask more questions or comment on what was said.

Practice changing the subject so that when one conversation line ends there is something else to talk about. Again, find common things such as newsworthy items or the weather, or sports, which will ensure that the person can talk about them. Stay abreast of the news by reading the paper or watching TV.

Maintain a good conversation by balancing your listening and speaking. By keeping the conversation balanced it helps ensure that the other person is engaged fully and keeps interest up. Don't bring up personal or sensitive issues with people whom you don't know well. Finally, learn to sense when the conversation is ending and help end the discussion on a high note.